Transition Period

Curly, dirty blonde hair
Hanging in locks over her freckled face
Feet curled up underneath her on the bed
Or in a chair
Writing furiously
As words drip from her like tears
With cold, pale hands
And fingernails bitten short
Writing with a black pen,
now purple, now blue
Her red-brimmed green eyes
Hiding behind her glasses

A silver spider necklace hangs down
On a delicate chain, she subconsciously touches it
Fingers brushing her protruding collarbone
She worries about her image
And touches the bruises, the scratches
On her arms from work
She thinks about her ex
She cries a little more

Driving home from work,
She flips through her CD's
Looking for the right one,
but feeling the indifference
Later she changes into her dragon wrap-skirt
Remembering a dream she had the other night
And a pale tank top
She slips on her worn, brown sandals
She calls me

These aching muscles

These aching muscles
This chaos I call hair
This chipped blue fingernail polish
I claim is beauty
See this scarred skin
See these sunken blue eyes
See my chapped lips
Can't you see my seasons?
Dripping with experience
Shivering with pain
and smile at pleasant memory
Know this pen and paper
See my heart exposed
And how can I keep writing
when the words aren't enough?

For _____

Emotion rips through your skin
A cresting tidal wave
As you take to the skies
Darkened by the pain of desire,
do not fear the beast inside me.

Heavenward is the vigil
A sign of your grace
Where your heart couldn't be
And you kindness would sting my face
like the frost upon my window
In a faded snowed-in memory
A flickering spark in a cloud of self-doubt

Your strongest foe is inside you
Until the final battle all remained calm
The storm of needles and blades
Show me the meaning of self-sacrifice
Show me the way of the warrior
Show me the secrets of the self
In all that is renewed,
and in everything that is dying.

No Faith

"No faith"
I whispered aloud
while everyone slept
watching the faces of my past
creep in and out of memory
like a long shadow
on the ground before my feet
"Why" I ask the moon,
in misty breath,
Though I have
no feeling in my fingers
"No faith in me"
I say to my reflection
in the muddy puddle
Cold within and cold without
I am Death's gentle virgin
But to no other
He waits for me on the other side
of this revelation
And whispers in the darkness
gentle charms, enchanting my dreams,
He brings out the death in me
Closer to the edge I walk
Crawl, and sometimes whimper
"It's not that simple"
I scream at everyone
But, they don't see
what's stripped down
when I am naked
They don't see
the cold rock of my former heart
beaten and bruised
Alone once again
I am left to die.

Smoking

I'm breathing smoke,
and wielding fire
Life's water courses through my veins
My feet are of the earth,
My soul devours the heavens.