As Much As I Can Stand

Sometimes my soul forgets to fly
I lose track of who I am
Slave to the life I didn't want
Yet this world passes away
The closer you are to me
+
My pain, my past is trivial
Compared to your mountain
How can you carry that burden?
I plead for you to stop
Because the past still matters to me
Come rest your pain here
I want to share it all for a while
As much as I can stand
+
I listen to you
Becoming the person you wanted
which never was much
You want to live freely
Fuck your parents, all their abuse
These are things I want too
My ticket out of here just might be you
Give me everything you have
I'll piggyback your dreams --
+
When I lose track of who I am
Slave to the life I chose
Before you wrapped your arms around me
Circling my mind like the stars
I turn dizzy when this world slips away
+
My pain is trivial
Share your sad stories
Your suicide and your sorrow
Your life is too much to bear
I'm addicted to the pain
As much as I can stand
+
Your words slip through my fingers
Sneak a smile, a silent kiss in your sleep
My misery is the seductive kind
+
You're an angel sent from the grave
A short fix to pull me back in
I know that life is still waiting
But I've been here before
I'll soothe your anger
And wash my hands in your blood again
+
I said give me some of your pain
Feel it pumping into my veins
I must still be alive
Alive enough anyway
+
Your past haunts me too
Come rest your pain here
We're all failures in our youth
My heart dares to cry
As much as I can stand
+
I know I'm still shit
Hideous, stupid and ignored
I've heard your lovely phrases before
Heard your filthy promises
Tell me what I want to hear
This can only end in more pain
+
As much as I can stand
Until my tears fall like glass breaking
It's the only reason I can cry
When you turn your back on me
I'll take it all the way to the grave this time
I'm addicted to your pain